"Treat Him Like an Athlete!"
“Treat him like an athlete!” Those words from Alex’s physical therapist wrapped around my heart and ran through every fiber of my being. My Alex, as many of you may remember, has physical challenges brought about by a rare metabolic disease. Alex was diagnosed at almost 3 years old and is about ready to turn 25. He has struggled with walking, stability and fine motor skills his whole life and has seen his challenges intensify as the years have gone on. He is facing another 1 step forward 2 steps back event after being sick this fall. Nothing new, but hard work. At a recent therapy session, Randy, our therapist, was giving instructions to an intern who was implementing the day’s session plans. Not knowing Alex well and observing the walking challenges he has, she was “starting slow”. Randy's words encouraged her to see Alex for who he was beyond his physical limitations.
My husband and I remember days when we wondered how we were going to help Alex recognize the physical limitations he has. He wanted to be a hockey player well past the time when he knew he couldn’t balance on skates. He expects to shoot basketball with his brother in the driveway, even though shooting will throw him off balance and he will most likely fall. We’ve always said it is a double edged sword that Alex doesn’t see clearly the obstacles in front of him. They are there, but not clearly in view. We came to realize that we didn't have to change his thinking. He never limited himself. We sometimes did. He wasn't going to play hockey, but perhaps he'd be involved in a different way. He'd figure that out because he allowed himself to think like the athlete he was.
Alex lost almost all his walking back in late November and has been fighting back to get his strength, stamina and balance. This time, he is seeing obstacles clearly as he falls more frequently and at first, couldn’t pull himself up from the floor. His reactions are those of someone who is ruffled and disappointed. He’s pounded the ground with his fist or cried out in frustration. I understand. Something so important to him as well as so close in his memory is just out of reach. He gets down on himself.
We all do. We wrestle and struggle about our circumstances and our trials. Sometimes we wrestle with who we are. Negativity creeps in. I can think of lots of times when I’ve wondered about my own value. Whether or not I have this parenting thing or spouse thing or work thing right. How could I be better, different or an improved version of me? Sometimes we feel overwhelmed. Sometimes we feel as if giving in to our lesser self is all we can, or should do. A precarious balance of our many plates spinning.
God doesn’t make junk. We’ve all heard that. A reminder that we are important to God. Each of us. Also a reminder to keep going, trying and persevering in all our circumstances. It can be a challenge to stay positive. Your mind will always believe what you tell it. Belief turns into what defines you and then imforms your attitudes and finally our choices.
Alex has always thought of himself as an athlete. He truly is in everything he does in how he approaches life. His closest friends and family know it. It is how he thinks, not just about trying to do things physically, but his statistical and strategical knowledge of sports that overlaps into the way he lives. Just because a person can’t walk well doesn’t mean he or she doesn’t play sports. What a gift it was for Alex to hear his therapist acknowledge it. To know his patient as a person and not just as his concerns or problems, and then pass this lesson on to his intern. How do we do that for ourselves and others? Do we limit ourselves? Do we limit others by the ways we choose to include or engage them? Do we make assumptions based on what we see rather than what we know or what we expect?
I can tell you as a parent of a child with a disability (who is now an adult), he has never seen himself as having a disability. He acknowledges that he doesn’t have the ability to do things in the same ways as others, but he sees himself as a person. Period. God sees us as precious and our capabilities limitless through Him.
Do you see yourself like that? Do you see yourself as the athlete or writer or teacher or whatever person you are created to be? Or are you willing to let the world’s standards change your attitude about yourself? How do you limit yourself?
When doubt creeps in or negativity wants to lead your thinking, remember who you are and WHOSE you are. Step out, believe it, do it and let God take care of how it is all supposed to turn out. Trust that God has it…don’t lead with fear. Lead with faith and take steps little and big toward your dreams, goals and what God calls you to be. Let your light shine. See the people in the world around you as the true individuals and precious gifts they are, too. Encourage them. “Treat them like an athlete”. Watch in awe as God’s plan unfolds.
